WEEK FOUR | FIRST TRIMESTER

SO. Week four. Sitting in Heathrow Airport killing time because it appears I've turned into an organised and far-too-early person these days. Feeling mildly anxious about heading to India..  worried about camera kit being lost or stolen.. getting a bad stomach.. flights and things being delayed and disrupted.. and worrying most about becoming ill and something going terribly wrong while I'm out there. I can't think of somewhere more strange to go through something scary and need medical intervention. I'm still feeling like I can't quite believe there's a tiny little something in there. Apparently it's the size of a poppy seed.. about the size of a full stop. Tiny but huge.

Yesterday I headed to see my GP to ask for any last minute tips or advice about travelling to India while pregnant (even though it's such early days). The probiotics I'd been advised to take are safe, as are all the meds I'd bought for an upset stomach. I had bought enough antihistamine to protect myself prophylactically and as boosters if required and was told not to touch them unless 'the benefit hugely outweighs the risk'. I left them at home. Antihistamine cream is apparently fine though so I grabbed some of that.

My GP asked if I was taking Folic Acid, and I told her I have and had been before as we'd been taking conception support supplements - I explained this was a planned pregnancy. She wished me congratulations and it felt amazing. I think she assumed it was my first.. I can't remember so much from the first time so in ways it feels like it is. Certainly the first time I've felt more prepared for whats to come. A few things already have made me aware of just how different it is being pregnant this time, even at such an early point. So far (subject to change obviously..) I feel like we are in control. We are relaxed and excited rather than having feeling lost and terrified. It's really... nice.

David keeps saying he is desperate to tell people, and that he feels more excited than he anticipated. We are both keen to tell Vivienne but both still want to wait until the first scan and know that everything's OK. We can't wait to see her reaction when we show her a picture.. It's lovely to have something special and sacred for us to be quietly excited about at the moment. I also feel quite relieved not to have to deal with being the centre of attention at the point we 'tell' yet, and not have to deal with so many questions from all angles about my well being/what gender we hope for/names/birth/yadda yadda yadda..

Names we quite like at the moment are: Ingrid for a girl. Feeling quite attached to this already. I also like Arlo and Ezra for a boy.. David isn't keen. We both had a geeky excited moment over the name Ned/Ed but we realised our love for Game of Thrones may not be the best source of inspiration we can come up with. We're also pretty tempted, if it's a boy, to call it John then call him by his middle name - which sounds like a bizarre idea but one which has been used by David's Dad, and brother my Grandpa and also our best man Jack. A strange tradition to carry on but why not, eh?

I know it's too early to have symptoms as such as it's such early days but I've had a few mild twinges in my abdomen, my boobs are feeling heavy and tender and I'm so dehydrated that I'm going through a good few litres of water a day, which surely can't be a bad thing.

I'll probably look back on this at some point and be irked by my upbeat self.. but so far I'm (dare I say it..) actually enjoying it?!